Gordon hated me. I was an ‘appliance’ for him to control, to gain emotional fuel and for all the ‘residual benefits’ that came with it such as me running his live for him and taking responsibility for everything.
If I had not had dreams and ambitions for my children and myself, then our life would have ended up like his parents. They lived a small, sad life of misery and drudgery and his mother was the scapegoat for all his father’s anger. She was the victim John the narcissist her entire married life and I saw this whenever we were in their company. Gordon treated her the same way.
You can see them in action here.
He had no desires in life and was happy to plod along imbued in negativity and excuses not to, rubbing his face, signing and saying his most popular excuse phrase, ‘haven’t has chance.’ That should be his epitaph!
Below are some examples of the abusive texts I received from Gordon.
As you can tell by the contempt filled words, he hates me. I have learned that a narcissist cannot love anyone. This video explains why.
They show his twisted mindset, his abuse and insults.
The texts are full of transference and projection whereby the accuses me of doing what her has ACTUALLY done. Including his brainwashing of my children against me. As a narcissist he is ‘projection-heavy’ in all his writings and interactions with me.
The narcissist has a grandiose opinion of himself. His sense of self-esteem and self-worth depends on how others perceive him and he denies flaws in himself and if forced to blame me for his own shortcomings, mistakes, and misfortunes.
His texts show that he is devaluing me to the children and telling them things about me to turn them against me.
I only wish I had read them properly and understood them at the time because they were telling me what he was doing with the children’s minds and what was to happen in the future.
In one text he actually talks about getting my daughter alone to tell her all about me.
4/07/07
“No problem me picking up B. I’ll have plenty of time to TACTFULLY explain the new sleeping arrangements in her home.”
His texts reveal his narcissism in full flight and contain many examples of the language he regularly used to attack me.
They also show his anger and rage when I don’t go alone with his plans. In his eyes, he is entitled to complete compliance with his wishes any anything else is a threat to his control.
A Description of The Narcissist- How He Thinks
This video describes how Gordon - a lesser narcissist thinks. The way a particular narcissist behaves is dependent on their cognitive ability, level of functioning and level of malign outlook. Gordon is a carbon copy of his father with more passive - aggressive...
The Narcissist Shows Physical Violence
The narcissist only showed physical violence on one occasion. It was in April 2007 after Gordon meet his new 'friend' as he called her at that time. He wanted to see the children so he could play happy families with her and her three children. We already had plans so...
What Is Narcissism?
Knowing what a narcissist is, and understanding how they behave is very useful as this knowledge will save you much time and misery as you go through life. In the videos here there are different explanations from different sources. The commonality between all...
The Narcissist Explains Why We Divorced!
It's all my fault! This is a great example of blame and lack of accountability. Gordon says we split up because I misinterpret the things he does and always see the worst interpretation of what he does. He says he is 'worried' and 'defensive' because I criticise him....
Explaining My Views On Mediation to The Narcissist
At the start of the divorce it was suggested by my solicitor that I try mediation with Gordon to save us both large solicitors fees and reduce conflict. Not knowing that he was a narcissist I thought it might work although by now I had experienced first hand his...
Manipulation and Blackmail Using The Children
Gordon manipulates and blackmails me and the children for financial gain. On 20th January 2008 a year after the divorce was filed, Gordon is still arguing over the money. ‘50:50 or nothing’ he states which is why he refuses to release the money for the mortgage or...
I Am The Family Scapegoat For Narcissists
I am the oldest child of six. I am the family scapegoat and the hero child. I am 'hard' because I tell it like it is and see straight though the façade. I was the family fixer, the hero for a large part of my life - until I woke up. My father, Anthony John Townsend...
Narcissist E-Mails About Contact With Children
Gordon sent these e-mails to tell me that he was very busy in June, July and August 2008 and needed to change his times with the children. However, this contradicts his e-mails sent in January 2008 where he threatened that he was going to get an 'emergency court...
Non Stop Criticism From The Narcissist #3 – From My Journal
Criticism is all about control. Looking at these stories through the lens of narcissism it is clear to me now that they are all about Gordon wanting to gain control, maintain control, and kill any threats to his control. Gordon's narcissistic thinking means that he...
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