I wrote to the narcissist – “I feel erased. I don’t exist to you.” The date I wrote this is not recorded.
This explains how I felt living with the Gordon, the narcissist.
At the time I did not know I was living with a fragile, vulnerable, covert narcissist.
The drawing was made by my 3 year old daughter.
” I Can’t Get Through To You
You define my experiences and seem to fail to grasp that.
I am a person with my own reality.
I feel erased.
I don’t exist to you.
Trying to maintain a relationship with you leaves me exhausted and in mental anguish and emotional pain.
You don’t want to hear me, understand me, nor even WANT to understand me.
You have to be right.
You tell me what I think and who I am.
Imply I am mad when I don’t agree.
You feel attacked when asked a question.
You don’t seem to hear me.
You avoid responsibility.
You are unable to be straight with people.
The typical passive aggressive man has not dealt with anger and power issues with parents and replays them in the current relationship.
I have a right to everything I feel. “
Journal – Introduction
Introduction I began writing this journal in 2003. I wanted to record my feelings and also the events leading up to the inevitable breakdown of my 27-year marriage to Gordon. I wanted my children to understand how hard I tried to fix the relationship and why, in the...
Does He Deliberately Act To Hurt? #4 From My Journal
When I wrote this journal I thought he deliberately said and did things to hurt me. What I have learned is that because of the type of narcissist he is, he has no awareness of how he behaves or the effect it has on others. The clusters of behaviours he uses are those...
Narcissist Ridiculing His Mother
The narcissist caught on camera ridiculing his mother! This video shows Gordon in action laughing at and belittling his mother. His father, her husband joins it at the end and must have been very proud of his protégé. This is an example of the behaviour I was at the...
How He Alienated My Children
He gradually and systematically alienated my children against me over many years. In fact since the day they were born they unconsciously learned that I was a valueless nothing to their father. The irony of that is, that I did EVERYTHING, made all the decisions and...
Covert Malignant Narcissist – Human in Name Only
Gordon behaved exactly the way this video describes. The quote in the video which says that a covert malignant narcissist does not know love and is, " a human in name only" is completely accurate. In my journal I write about him being an empty shell and having no...
The Narcissist Was Only With Me For Residual Benefits
Gordon hated me with a deep contempt for everything about me. This video called 'You are a toaster' explains that to a narcissist I only realised the true extent of his hatred recently when he has stooped so low as to brainwash my daughters into hating me. That...
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