The narcissist called me ‘mad’, ‘mad woman’, ‘crazy’, ‘mentally deranged’ and ‘beyond hope’, ‘up the pole’ etc. etc.  out entire married life.

He liked to say those things in front of the children which worried me, with good reason as it turned out. (July 2021)

Little did I know the effect this would have on them and the parental alienation that would happen in the future.

This letter explains how I feel about being called mad and the other names he called me. 


“Your Mad”

I have already asked you in a text to stop expressing your opinion of my mental health but you continue to do so as you have done throughout our relationship.

It is more serious now, as I do not think it very healthy for the children to constantly hear your opinion of their mother.

For example “there is something wrong with you,” “you are mad”‘ and as you were leaving a few days ago, “you’ve got mental problems.” How do yoµ think it makes them/me feel? Before yoµ excuse yourself by saying that you said it in anger you are lying.

You were not angry when you said  it in David Lloyd last week and you were not angry when you left a few days ago.

In my opinion, you call me mad as a method of blaming me for all the problems in our relationship. I must be mad because yoµ must be allowed to say and do as you like  and should your behaviour make me angry in any way you can exeuse yourself from any responsibility because my reactions are that of a “mad woman” another popular phrase used by you.

This is your faulty thought process.

I (you)  can say or do what I like because l didn’t mean any harm, even if it might hurt a persons feelings or cause problems. If  a person i.e.ME takes offence or gets upset then I cannot be to blame because I didn’t mean any harm said it in anger or c. the person must be mad or d. the person has said you’might benefit from seeing a councillor which you twist to mean ‘that the person has called you  mad too so that makes it okay for you to say it.

I would like you to think about this idea so that we may get along better for the sake of the children.

This is the idea. …… you could possibly be responsible for the way I behave towards you.

You just might do things which could conceivably make a person angry.

You have the power to make a choice not to do and say the things which make that person angry, even if you think your actions and words are harmless. Incidentally, do you think smirking and sniggering at a person are harmless actions? But I imagine  you  feel you have good reason to do it.

The fact that both my mother and sister suffered from serious mental health problems resulting  in them both being hospitalised several  times makes your opinion particularly insensitive at best, worst eviL

From experience you know full well how  a person with mental problems behaves.

You feel I behave as if I have them. Either you· are not very clever in that  you have leamed nothing from your experiences with my family or you say it deliberately to hurt me. You also equate your comments i.e. you are mad, there’s something wrong with you and you have mental problems, all said within the last week, as being the same as me suggesting to you that you might find counselling helpful to our relation.

You are dishonest and you use this tactic of twisting words whenever we have a discussion. about our relationship.

If you wish to have a discussion about your perception of my mental health  I am quite willing to do so in  private without the children being present.

Please have the self control not to make any further comments in a similar vein. This is the second time I have asked you to do this.’

If you comment again I will petition for a divorce immediately on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour showing the judge this letter as she may agree that your behaviour constitutes mental abuse.

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