Gordon hated me. I was an ‘appliance’ for him to control, to gain emotional fuel and for all the ‘residual benefits’ that came with it such as me running his live for him and taking responsibility for everything.

If I had not had dreams and ambitions for my children and myself, then our life would have ended up like his parents. They lived a small, sad life of misery and drudgery and his mother was the scapegoat for all his father’s anger. She was the victim John the narcissist her entire married life and I saw this whenever we were in their company. Gordon treated her the same way.

You can see them in action here.

He had no desires in life and was happy to plod along imbued in negativity and excuses not to, rubbing his face, signing and saying his most popular excuse phrase, ‘haven’t has chance.’ That should be his epitaph!

Below are some examples of the abusive texts I received from Gordon.

As you can tell by the contempt filled words, he hates me.  I have learned that a narcissist cannot love anyone. This video explains why.

They show his twisted mindset, his abuse and insults.

The texts are full of transference and projection whereby the accuses me of doing what her has ACTUALLY done. Including his brainwashing of  my children against me. As a narcissist he is ‘projection-heavy’ in all his writings and interactions with me. 

The narcissist has a grandiose opinion of himself. His sense of self-esteem and self-worth depends on how others perceive him and he denies flaws in himself and if forced to blame me for his own shortcomings, mistakes, and misfortunes. 

His texts show that he is devaluing me to the children and telling them things about me to turn them against me.

I only wish I had read them properly and understood them at the time because they were telling me what he was doing with the children’s minds and what was to happen in the future.

In one text he actually talks about getting my daughter alone to tell her all about me.

4/07/07

“No problem me picking up B. I’ll have plenty of time to TACTFULLY explain the new sleeping arrangements in her home.” 

His texts reveal his narcissism in full flight and contain many examples of the language he regularly used to attack me.

They also show his anger and rage when I don’t go alone with his plans. In his eyes, he is entitled to complete compliance with his wishes any anything else is a threat to his control.

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