Living With And Living After Narcissistic Abuse
The Narcissists Creates The Facade of The Loving Father
I was always unhappy in my relationship with the narcissist. It is common for people in relationships to know from the start that something is not right. I knew but I didn’t listening to myself.
The narcissist openly admitted that he would not have had children if it weren’t for me wanting them so much.
That makes it particularly easy to see how he could use them as pawns in his narcissistic games.
The narcissist G finally left in May 2006 after moving out twice before.
G wrote this letter about wanting to see the children.
It is is full of lies and nothing more than facade faking.
Once he met BB his next supply, the children were used and manipulated to make it seem like he cared about them and was the doting father.
He began working with BB on her business and would drop the children like a hot brick when it suited him.
He even decided he wanted custody of the children which was driven by him wanting half the money.
His desire for custody changed from him telling me that he’s not looking after them FOR ME because I won’t do what I am told, to wanting half custody to wanting full custody.
The texts and e-mails he sends do not uphold his facade of being a doting father. He is busy ay work, resents having to look after them FOR ME and resents having what he says is time to himself.
He is under the delusion that I deliberately stalk him and find out when he is going out with the new supply or busy with work -and then I FORCE him to look after the children FOR ME!
Do Narcissists Love Their Children?
In this video it explains how it is impossible for Narcissists love their children.
The letter written by the narcissist pretends he is the loving, doting father who wants to be really involved with the children, see them as often as possible – even at short notice.
As time progresses you can see from the angry and bitter texts where he clearly shows is resentment of the children.
His use of the children in order to get money from the divoirce is clearly seen by him wanting to half first 50/50 custody to wanting FULL custody.
Gordon’s Letter about Wanting Contact With Children
Reassessed after the Holidays.
I would like to spend time with the kids every day and I think it is important for them (especially A) to know I am always available and close by.
However,- I know it is impossible for us to lay down a time everyday when it is convenient for us to see each other.
I would hope you would encourage the kids to phone me at any time and as often as they like. (I will do the same when I am looking after them.)
PROPOSED MINIMUM SCHEDULE OF CONTACT
I have tried to lay down times when I think it is convenient for them and us to give me the minimum amount of contact each week. I wanted you to let me know of any other time outside my proposed schedule when it would be convenient for you and the kids to see me, even at short notice.
I NEED AS MUCH TIME AS POSSIBLE WITH THEM BECAUSE:-
During my contact time with the kids I intend to make sure I keep up to date with their social issues, concerns, ambitions, relationships, etc.
I want to talk to each of them individually more often. Need to talk about things they need – clothes, books, CD’s, sports equipment etc.
Show that I am in full support of what you are doing with them in schoolwork. Help with any problems they may have. Do language in car long journeys. Regular drawing/art lessons and visits to galleries etc. and generally be interested.
Spend time keeping fit, badminton, jogging, walking, core work, & being active. Generally encouraging them to look after themselves physically eat healthily at all times.
FUN + RELAXATION
Will spend time playing, riding bikes, cinema, barbeques, watching the odd DVD, TV etc.”
In the following texts you can see that the narcissist changes his story as time progresses and his true narcissistic self is exposed.