This was my attempt to describe the type of relationship I would have liked to have had.
The writing shows what was missing in the relationship with the Narcissist.
In short everything was missing.
“Forced with the prospect of 40 + years in this relationship is something I don’t want.
I have tried over the past five or so years to talk and explain but things seem to get in the way.
I feel not just today, but everyday a smile seems to make you think I feel good. But inside I’m miserable and have been for years.
My needs are not being met in my job, life, or marriage.
I have to decide if I can have them met within the present situation or things need changing drastically.
Relationship
I need someone who listens and understands, is interested in me, has enthusiasm for life and does things, shows me things sometimes, someone who shares responsibility for day to day running of things, nurturing the relationship, (emotionally taking care of the relationship).
Someone who can take charge of a situation occasionally without being pushed.
How does a person show interest in things?
- Initiates a conversation about it.
- Read a book, magazine on the topic
- Find out information on it by talking, discussing.
How does a person take care emotionally of a relationship?
- Outward signs of affection, touch, etc.
- Talking to the person (not about work)
- Taking the trouble to do things that the other person likes
- Knowing what the other person likes and need first
- Saying …”How do you feel about”
I have given up doing all the above.
Since I have stopped talking, have you noticed that no talking takes place?
Think back over the years, all the things I have done to keep the relationship going? You have not reciprocated so I’ve given up.
I feel like I am living with a wax dummy who only comes to life when work is discussed.
Why is it that you can phone up someone to do with work yet you can’t phone, write or get in contact with friends.”
Videos
The Narcissist In Action These videos were filmed by me when my son was born. They capture the dynamics and the hatred for each other that the Ashton family has. John verbally, emotionally and psychologically abused his wife their entire married life. She had no idea...
A Crash Course In Narcissism by HG Tudor
"Simplicity is the Ultimate Sophistication" Leonardo Da Vinci HG Tudor offers the best, most straight forward and most accurate explanation of what narcissism is and how the different behaviours of the narcissist serve the 'prime aims' as he calls them. The work of...
Bullying Siblings 2010 Letter To Gordon
This is what happens when your children witness you being verbally and emotinally abused their entire life. They become bullies themselves. My youngest daughter complained that her brother and sister were verbally abusing her and bullying her. I was shocked and...
Admitting Triangulation Using the Children
In this text the narcissist Gordon admits to using the children in a triangulation against me. He uses them to threaten and manipulate me. He used the standard abusive language he uses regularly. "Everyone thinks its dispicable that you use the children like this.."...
Call With My Sister in 1996
This is a transcript of a conversation I recorded with my sister who was, soon after diagnosed as having schizophrenia. She later had the diagnosis of Bipolar made. At the time of this my sister had a new baby. She was hospitalized before and after the birth and I...